Child Loss: Who Am I?
When my son died I no longer knew who I was. I was lost. I felt as though half of me was missing. I felt transparent to the world — like everyone could see right through me and see that my heart was broken and bleeding. My mind raced and my tears flowed and I cried out to whoever would listen. “Who am I? I don’t know who I am any more!” And, the truth is that I really didn’t know who I was when my son died. Was I Samuel’s mom? Was I still a mother? Was I an ex-mother? Who was I? Suddenly my identity changed and there…
Child Loss: I’m So Lost Without My Child!
Twenty-four years ago I experienced a pit of grief like I never want to experience ever again. My son died. The moment Samuel’s soul left this earth, he took part of me with him — a part of my heart and a part of my soul and I knew that those parts of “us” would never return again. I was lost. And scared. And felt so alone. For the first time in my life I didn’t know if I could go on living.